This poem reflects the struggle of abuse I experienced and the fear it caused, I felt incredibly trapped. I felt isolated and I was living with daily physical and mental abuse. Speaking with women’s aid encouraged me to leave. Just before I left I felt God’s hand on my life- my heart felt full for the first time in years. It’s understanding that none of what is spoken over you is NOT true and that you are worthy of love. You are beautiful. You are loved. The abuse I experienced and the abuse others experience is unacceptable, it should not be tolerated. Abusers seeks out our vulnerability and they abuse emotionally, physically, sexually, financially. They see what we could be, they are afraid of us and our potential. Every woman deserves to be loved and treated with kindness.
This is a photo after I left my abuser I married the kindest man, this was me on our wedding day, I had wings added to my dress- I’m free of abuse, I spread my wings and show other women they can be free, there is freedom in love.
As she looked in the mirror and searched for herself, she seemed to disappear
She heard the door slam shut, her heart began racing in fear
She hid in a cupboard, crouching listening to figure out if she would be hurt again
Foot steps stomped up the stairs, the door flung open, she was dragged out and felt a sudden pain
That evening as her back hurt and she could see the bruising
She felt confusion
Was love supposed to be this sore?
Could she really keep taking beatings more and more?
She stood inside of her gilded cage
He told her the dishes were wet and she felt the brunt of his rage.
She found a letter from another women
The humiliation of his disloyalty- she came to realise he was not a good human
Breathing lightly, slowly not to disturb the bear
She felt a sudden blow to her head, she didn’t seem to care
This was a nightly routine, she breathed too loudly, suffered blow after blow
She could not find the strength to go
The crisp cold air she struggled to catch her breath
He had told her the only way she would leave was through her own death
She began to carry out her final escape
Then she felt a hand and stopped- this was the end of the domestic abuse and rape
The chains were broken
She became out spoken
She left everything behind- she described leaving as the chains on her wings being broken, her wings stretched out, head raised high, adorning her freedom for all to see
The women she could truly be.
[Image description: An image of a woman in a long, white wedding dress. She has dark wavy hair and is facing away from the camera. She is holding her hands up in the air.]